I chew so I poo.                                                                                  

Not chewing can bring you hurt poo

I chew good, do you?

Now sit and reflect upon my haiku.  Yes, I know its simple but fixing digestive issues, losing weight, gaining weight, and many other ailments can be helped with a simple solution.

What is that simple solution?  Well let me tell you, it does not come in a magic pill, diet, injection, fiber powder…it has to do with slowing down and chewing.  Chewing 60 times is your goal, but I get it this is a change from the normal inhalation of food while driving or eating over the sink while the kids do homework.  I get it, I am there too.  Every time I eat I get to remind myself of this.  It is time to change the way we eat, take back our meal times!

And guess what, Mom, I know there are starving kids all over the world but that is no reason for me to inhale my food as fast as possible and overeat.  🙂

Step One

Sit down at the table, on the floor, outside in the grass with your food.  Now quiet your mind (or shut your eyes for 10 seconds while your son throws his noodles at his sister) and give gratitude for the food you have in front of you.  Yes, ideally the people enjoying your meal with you would join in but I get it, I have kids too…

If you cannot control your environment (for example you are in a break room at work where others are inhaling their food around you) then put in headphones, look at beautiful imagery.  Do something that relaxes you.  It is important to let your body go into a parasympathetic state so that you enjoy fueling your body.

Step Two

Look at the food and drink in front of you and think about the strength it will give you.  Try and do this as a family; do it in prayer, sing a song, write it down, talk about it, whatever you can do to get everyone involved in forming a good relationship with food.  If you can get this instilled into your kids now then maybe they will not have the same battles with food that you have had.  You are giving your kids a lifelong skill of appreciating food and loving how it fuels them.  This family time is irreplaceable; there is no amount of money that can give your kids the confidence, optimism, gratitude, grace, and positive body image that a meal as a family can.  And I get the working parents, single mom/dad, kids in sports, school events that can occur.  So take what you can get; even if it is half the family or 3 days a week for breakfast.  Make the most of the time you have.

Step Three

Check your food out.  It is hot isn’t it…those big blue eyes, those strong arms, those muscular abs….oops, I got distracted in checking out my husband.  Back to the food in front of you…now really look at it, is it colorful?  Can you see that creamy grass fed butter from the local farm melting off of it?  Now smell it; take in all those lovely scents. Can you smell the garlic, the rosemary, the lovely complex smells?  Enjoy the site and smell of your food before you start digging in.  Letting your brain be in the parasympathetic state that its in from successfully completing steps one and two will let the looking and smelling start getting those salivary glands going.  Yes, a little drool is not a bad thing.  Drool will help magical things happen in later steps…

Step Four

Now cut off a small bite of your food (think toddler size) and put it in your mouth.  Does it taste amazing?  I hope so, if not then it is just not worth eating!

Step Five

Now chew, yes chewy, chew….chew at least 30 times, but shoot for 60 times.  Think of singing “Happy Birthday” in your head as you are chewing.  That chewing should be so enjoyable, it should be tasteful.  Your food should be of the highest quality; high quality food will make you a high quality person.  And enjoying this food will help you need less food (yes that is my retort when you tell me how pricey organic high quality food is).  Since you are doing such a great job chewing those salivary glands are going to work for you.  They are breaking down the enzymes of the food and making it ready for you to digest.  Not to just digest, but to power you and fuel you.

Step Six

Has that food become liquid?  Yes- then swallow.  No- then keep chewing!  Now here is the coolest thing about step six; you are done!  Your digestive system will take over from here; it will make sure the organs, cells, bones, etc get the nutrients that they need to help you function.

Step Seven

Repeats steps one-six.  Take your time, do not rush and let your body do its magic.

Bonus Step

And this is when you poo….after making steps 1-6 a habit you will discover that your poo is your friend.  You celebrate it; it no longer hurts you, no longer causes abdominal discomfort, and makes the bathroom smell a whole lot less than it use to.

Enjoy your meals, enjoy the company you share your meals with, enjoy the peace and quiet of eating alone.  Just enjoy it.  The more you enjoy and slow down in your eating the more you will see happy health results.

With joy and poo,


For other poo related humor, my fitness antics, health hints, and ways I can help reduce your symptoms contact me.  I am currently accepting long distance clients and accepting individual, family, and corporate clients in the Charleston, SC area.